When It Rains, It Pours

Much of the country is experiencing semi-drought conditions right now, so I have been watering my lawn in the evenings like most of my neighbors.

Our sprinkler is rather flimsy, but it does the job. It can really put out a lot of water, but I have to place a brick on its base to keep it from flying all over the yard. Once it is secure, I can adjust the strength of the sprinkler with one knob and the pattern with another.

Here is why this information is important. The other night, my wife decided to "help" me.

I had just gotten it adjusted to spray those portions of the front yard that were particularly dry. But my wife was not satisfied with this. She thought that we needed to make it weaker since it was spraying the driveway somewhat and tried turning the spigot on the side of the house lower. I told her that it was fully open and that I could adjust it at the sprinkler.

"No, you can't", she replied. Turn. Turn. Turn.
"Yes, I can! Look." She didn't look. Turn. Turn. Turn. The other way.
"That's for the pattern!" Turn. Turn. Turn. Back again.

I motioned her over finally and reminded her of the little throttle on the side. I even demonstrated it for her.

"Oh", she replied finally.

At this point, she thought we weren't properly covering the lawn, so she went back up to the house and began pulling on the hose to move it closer to the house. Before I could tell her to stop, she pulled the sprinkler out from under the brick. The sprinkler promptly fell on its side and started thrashing about, spraying me in the process before I stomped it down with my foot.

The look on my face must have spoken volumes, because all she said was, "Do you just want to go in the house now?"

I did. I really did.